i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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