I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
is wine microwaveable?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
