Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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