doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
