he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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