Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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