I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
