Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Randomize
