This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
