Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Do you still have your period?
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
