Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
