i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
