Your mouth is God's brothel.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
