I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
