we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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