She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
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