it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
