I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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