i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
40s are totally the cure
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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