I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I can't put those talents on a resume
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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