I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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