btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize
