Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
