But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
