I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
