Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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