Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
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