Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
