If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
even my farts smell like vagina
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
