can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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