That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
