i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
