i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
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