Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Randomize
