No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
