Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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