would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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