Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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