Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
third nipple confirmed
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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