What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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