it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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