You're my little dorito
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
