I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
