Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
So squirting runs in the family.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
