More tranny stories later!
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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