my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
