Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize