I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
