Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I wear drunk well.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
