Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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